So it’s excelerating

So the next time after “stop making me look like an asshole” incident, (previous post), my daughter is lying on her side on the bed with her laptop. He’s on the bed laying behind her. Girlfriend is there, too. He reaches over and holds DD by the arm. She tries to move it. He holds it down. So she struggles. He pulls his strength on her and suddenly turns her over toward him, at which point she strikes out and hits him. She nails him in the eye. This, of course, infuriates him. Cuss words go flying, and he grabs her arms with both hands with barely concealed rage. She said she was scared stiff by the look of his face, the curses and the rage squeezed between clenched teeth. We have a long talk about what her options are when she’s with him. I tell her physical retaliation or even defense on her part isn’t a great idea, unless her life is threatened and she has the ability to escape. Should never be first course of action. I tell her she needs to vocalize her discomfort rather than physically struggle, take advantage of the fact that Tabitha is there, … Continue reading

It’s a Matter of Time

DD was upset, because no one could see what he was really like. She was aware of how sweetly he talked to her in front of others, and how mean he could be behind their backs. Then he got a girlfriend, and things eased up for her, but she still resented the double face, the false image he portrayed in front of others. Just a couple weeks ago, the Narcissist EX, went off on my daughter in front of the girlfriend – let’s call her “Tabitha”. First time – cuss words and all. She (my daughter) was mortified. Tabitha had no response – more on that later. I told my dd, that her father was able to actually cuss at her in front of his girlfriend, led me to believe he was feeling more secure in his relationship with her, that he was feeling more in control. I said he was testing the waters. It was only a matter of time, before he went off on his girlfriend. I’ve learned a little about her. A woman of strength and intelligence, a productive, self-made sort of woman, with a great deal of emotional vulnerabilities. Perfect. He had courted her, spun his … Continue reading