And they are among the first things your narcissist will want you to drop.
Actually, mine wasn’t so bad in that regard. He liked me having friends if it meant I would be out of his hair when he was with his, which was quite often. But he didn’t like me being friends with people who knew what he was up to, and often would try to discredit their character just in case they would tell me something.
I was never a real social person, so it worked out for me to stay home, and I had my artwork to keep me occupied.
Anyway, I can see how much of a protection your friends can provide you if you’re with a Dr. Jekyl/Mr Hyde type of person, because they can help to give you perspective. When you’re with a narcissist, you begin to doubt yourself like crazy, because you keep giving him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe you were mistaken, or maybe that’s how he really remembers it, or maybe…maybe…maybe…
But a friend can snap you out of it. A friend can verify what happened, can lead you back to yourself.
Yesterday, I spent several hours with a friend as we shared our experiences and insights together. We ate junk food, told jokes and did quite a bit of laughing. You have to do that. You have to support yourself, but more than that, you have to allow others support you, too.
You deserve that, even if he makes you feel like you don’t.